What makes a person exceptional? Former FBI agent and author Joe Navarro addressed this question in an article for CNBC News.
His observations show that some people are not exceptional because they have a high level of education and a good income or talent.
On the contrary, extraordinary people are very disciplined, can observe and communicate well, act in a controlled manner and are at peace with themselves.
There are people who stand out from the rest. People who draw attention when they enter a room. like because it You know an incredible amount, or because they are too sensitive. Who has this additional advantage, who inspires us and instills respect. They serve us as role models or mentors. Mother Teresa was like this person or Albert Einstein – but family members, friends, bosses or colleagues can also be extraordinary people.
But what makes it so exceptional? What are the common features between them? This is the question former FBI agent Joe Navarro asked himself CNBC News PostOccupy. For more than 40 years, he has conducted research on human behavior as a factor. He is now known as an author and specialist in body language. His notes show: rare People are not because they have a high level of education, a lot of money or a hidden talent. Instead, he says, there are five characteristics that make it so special.
1. even indiscipline
the people, who are very disciplinedNavarro writes that, through their dedication and curiosity, they manage to bring out the best in themselves. As an example, he cites Usain Bolt in his article – the fastest person who ever lived. He reached his stature not only through his athletic talent, but through iron self-discipline. He sacrificed himself, focused on his goal, and worked hard. There are a few other examples in high-performance sports: basketball player Michael Jordan, for example, or tennis star Serena Williams.
According to Navarro, self-discipline also includes knowing your strengths and weaknesses. Only then will you feel if you are having a good day or a bad day, when it is better to let others take the lead, or how to face your demons.
The good news is that we can learn self-discipline. You just have to be willing to work on yourself. Ask yourself what you can do on your own to make the change. What knowledge do you need to achieve your goals? How can you improve with books, a mentor or, for example, an online course?
2. Observation skills
In the article, Navarro writes that observing is more than just looking. When observing, we used all of our senses to better understand our surroundings and especially others. While this will require a lot of effort, it will also be much more straightforward.
For example, people who are good observers will know what others are looking for, what their intentions are, and what explanations might be for their behavior. According to Navarro, good observers can successfully distinguish between important and unimportant and have also learned to properly classify and evaluate their observations.
3. Communication skills
People communicate all the time. A person says an average of 16,000 words a day. This shows study From 2007 it was done by linguist Matthias Mehl of the University of Arizona in Tucson. So we talk a lot. Whoever manages to communicate the right way, Navarro wrote, is admired. On the other hand, those who communicate poorly create suspicion or even anger.
In the article, he outlines four important steps for how good communication can work:
Deal with feelings first. this is important. We cannot think clearly as long as unspoken emotions flow within us or within our peers. It is important to be able to read other people’s body language. Navarro explains how this is done in his book See What Others Think. For example, if a person is constantly playing with his hair, he is trying to calm down or wants to pass the time. The stress could be caused by a strained forehead. A fake smile can be recognized by the inactive muscles around the eyes. On the other hand, if it is real, we lift our cheeks and wrinkles form under our eyes.
Build a relationship with your peer. who succeeds By showing empathy and concern. According to Navarro, you can express this verbally or nonverbally: for example, with a warm handshake when greeting.
responds immediately. Navarro writes that prompt response to calls or emails shows appreciation. Even if the conversation includes something uncomfortable, don’t put it off.
listen properly Pay attention not only to what someone says, but also how. In what order do the words appear? Does someone mention certain details often? If our peer repeats a topic too often, according to Navarro, this may provide information about unresolved problems.
4. The ability to act in a controlled manner
The way we act reflects who we really are, what matters to us and how we feel about others. We can only fully control our actions if we first acquire the three qualities described above:
self control It allows us to react not impulsively in certain situations, but in the way we want and in a way that is beneficial to us.
Good power of observation It helps us understand situations in their context so that we can act appropriately.
through communication We receive important information that gives us direction for our actions.
According to Navarro, before making any decision, extraordinary people would ask themselves the following questions: Do my actions inspire confidence? Does it add value? Do I influence others in a positive way? Does it benefit others?
5. Psychological well-being
Psychological well-being is a state in which our emotional and physical needs are met. It is the foundation of our mental and physical health and determines almost everything in our lives: from the choices we make in our relationships to the products we prefer to buy in the supermarket. Navarro wrote that when we are mentally healthy, we thrive.
Since we’re all designed for psychological well-being, it doesn’t take a big gesture, according to the former FBI agent — a reassuring word, a thank-you note, a smile, or a reminder to take a break. take. It is the point where self-control, good observation, communication, and action meet. Navarro writes that it helps us perceive and do best to reduce unwanted emotions such as stress, fear, or anxiety.
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